Master Mechanic
Kenny Boettger

Hometown: Saranac Lake, NY. All-American city. 

Title: Co-founder, Chief of the Fun Department

Reason for employment: 21 years ago Julie and I figured it’d be a swell idea to start the coolest bike shop around. It’s been a great ride so far! 

Two factoids that the rest of the world might not yet know about yerself: 

I rode my first half-century in Maryland when I was 6 on a red Huffy single-speed. Man was my dad ticked when he found me and realized I’d hitchhiked all the way to Maryland! 

I love traveling to cool places, especially if there’s deep powder to be had, fun singletrack to be ridden, or pickled scorpion on the menu. The finer things! 

One reason you love bikes: Bikes mean freedom! Plus, they’re really fun. 

Favorite ride: Mountain bikes? Hardy RD—Wilmington’s finest. On the road, our ‘Fantastic Fifty-Two’ hits some of the best stuff around—out towards Tupper Lake, past Lake Clear, back through Saranac Lake, and back home. 

Favorite ice cream flavor: Coffee gelato or lemon sorbet. 

Closing remarks: If you’re passing through this neck of the woods, come check us out. We’ve got the coolest bikes in stock and ready to ride, a great staff, and did I mention we have a super-charged espresso machine? Pronto! 

Photographer
Julie Voss

Hometown: Illinois, smack dab in America’s heartland

Title: Co-founder, Janitorial Strategist

Reason for employment: A few years back I was perfectly content sailing through the Caribbean, sampling rum from the deck of a beautiful 1935 Fife sailboat when I was talked into this whole bike shop gig. 

Two factoids that the rest of the world might not yet know about yourself: 

1. My happy, healthy, 98-year-old grandmother has written me a letter every week since I first left for school.
2. I live in Phnom Penh, Cambodia when not in Lake Placid.

Favorite ride: The Keene- New Russia- Elizabethtown loop is tough to beat. If we’re talking off-road, I’m happiest skirting the canals of Europe, as long as there are a handful of good pubs along the way! 

Favorite ice cream flavor: Shawarma. Just kidding! Anything from Berthillon eaten while gazing over the Siene. (We looked up half a dozen of these words and learned that shawarma is a tasty meat concoction grilled on a spit, the Berthillon is responsible for France’s tastiest ice cream, and the Seine is a twisting waterway running through France, synonymous with romance, Napoleon, fantastic cycling and some of the best food and wine on the planet.) 

Champion of Cycle
Tatyana Reinboldt

Place of birth: Indianapolis, Indiana. Home to Kurt Vonnegut, sliced bread, and the Indianapolis 500. Did you know that the first event held at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway was really a helium balloon competition? Nope, of course you didn’t. See– Indianapolis will keep you on your toes!

Hometown: Lisbon, Iowa. The loving place where people pretend to know where you are from but have absolutely no idea.. ‘You said you were from Idaho right?’

Reason for employment: I’m the store manager. Due to the fact that I possess a keen knack for cycling fashion and have upper management written all over me, I’m around to keep the place running like clockwork and our customers satisfied.

Reason for relocating from Iowa to the Winter Sports Capital of the World: You likely know this, but the Hawkeye State (where I grew up) is famous for corn, chickens, and this crazy law which states that it’s illegal for a mustached man to kiss a woman in public. I’m not that passionate about corn, and prefer beautiful mountains and twisty singletrack, so this was a pretty natural fit. Oh, did you know that Iowa is home to the national Hobo Convention? Yup. That’s another reason I came here.

Claim to Fame: I’m a certified Specialized Body-Geometry bike fitter, and I’m good at it! I ride a Trek Remedy, and consider it the finest form of off-road transportation. Ask me about it. What else? Oh. I was born with my tongue stuck to the bottom of my mouth. That’s since been resolved, thank goodness.

Zodiac Sign: Gemini. The world is full of joy, as far as I’m concerned.

Parting Thoughts: Well, since you’re asking. If I had to say, my favorite road bike loop in the Adirondacks would be the Fantastic Fity-Two, hands down. Also, since you’re still asking, if I had to bring two things with me to a deserted island, I’d bring another human (preferably one I enjoyed spending time with), and a knife. I’m a practical person. A knife would be much more useful than a toaster oven, for example. Unless there were electricity, I suppose…

The Real McGiver
McGiver

Head Shop Mechanic

Dare Devil
Alex Goff

Job Description: Not getting hurt so I can actually get to work tomorrow

Outdoor McGuiver
Shane Kramer

Age: Just a number. 

Place of birth: The Empire State. 

Social Security Number: 7. 

Two factoids that the rest of the world might not yet know about yerself: Listen here, you little whippersnapper. I’ve got calves so big I almost served as Schwarzenegger’s calf-double in Pumping Iron except I was out riding and missed the phone call. I raced Ironman twice while eating nothing but Funyuns and Tic Tacs, and I’ve got a pro mountain bike license. I brew more beer out of my bathtub in a month than Lagunitas does in a leap year, and my border collie is smarter than your honor student. I used to own a business hand-crafting my own guitars, I go out riding with John Kerry on a weekly basis, and I’ve drafted high-rez maps for every inch of singletrack in this county. Any more questions? Oh yeah, and I drive a Honda. What of it? 

Describe yourself in a sentence: It must have been Dennis Rodman or Robert Greene that coined the phrase “Jack of all trades, master of none…” but it was Shane Kramer that coined the phrase, “I’m better than you at everything.”  

What would you say it is you do around here, anyway? If it’s broke, best let me fix it. If it’s not broke, better let me check it anyway. Otherwise, you’ll find me out riding or saddled up at the all-you-can-eat clambake at Tail of the Pup. Or at Liquids and Solids, hitting shamelessly on the bartender. 

Closing remarks: Because is the best answer for everything. 

Zodiac: Last I checked this wasn’t Santa Fe, New Mexico. Let’s focus on the matter at hand. Broken? I’ll fix it.

Man of Steel
Matt Young

Age: Old enough. 

Hometown: Chestertown, NY. Birthplace to all that is awesome. 

Reason for employment: Sometimes, a bike shop just needs a guy like me around. And by “guy like me” I mean someone who’s raced Ironman, has biceps big enough to shred any piece of clothing that comes from the Gap Outlet, and has helped build most every inch of singletrack in this county. 

Two factoids that the rest of the world might not yet know about yerself: 1) Once… okay. Wait. Not once, but like 54 times, I convinced my employer to let me double the amount of vacation time that I was allotted in a working year to go do incredible things outdoors, like paddle an insanely remote river in Siberia fueled by nothing other than canned horsemeat and daily doses of lingering communist fervor, and drive a mostly insulated Ford Econoline van with a woodstove in it to the Chic Choc mountains in northeastern Quebec to go backcountry skiing. 2) I’m a professional kayaker, certified educator, expert extreme-vacation taker, and all around helpful guy. Also, I have a lot to do with the fact that every student graduating from Lake Placid Elementary knows how to have fun riding a mountain bike. Neat, huh? 

Closing remarks: Horsemeat ain’t all it’s canned up to be. 

Doodle Overlord
Bill Frazer

Age: Biological age: 35. Mental age:  still trying to sneak into R-rated movies. 

Hometown: Andrew Cuomo land. 

Reason for employment: The Frazer factor: knows as much about Fox forks as he does about Felt TT frames. Excitable, fun, ready to help. 

One factsoid that the rest of the world might not yet know about yerself: 

1) I like to draw. Often times they’re just little sketches of what’s going on in my mind.  Take, for instance, a dinosaur on a motorcycle.  I doodled that up while waiting for Keith McKeever to show up for Friday night’s Hardy ride. Don’t you think dinosaurs would have ridden bikes, you know, if they could have? And there were bikes around?

One reason you love bikes: According to a recent peer-reviewed study by Readers Digest (large print edition), bikes are the world’s best form of transportation. Pogo-sticking is second. Kurt Vonnegut put it best when he said, “I tell you, we’re here on Earth to fart around and ride bikes. Don’t let anybody tell you different.” 

Favorite ride: Cinderella story to Craig Wood to Broken Dreams to Loop 3 to Cherry Patch up 86 to Lumber Yard to Judge Smails to Night Putting to Twisted Sister to Bushwood to the Lake for a Swim. Confused? See above, ‘Frazer factor’. 

Admiral of Advice
McCahill

Age: 28

Place of Birth: Born and bred in the Olympic Village of Lake Placid. Actually, wait. I’m gluten-free now so I was just born and corn tortilla’d in the Olympic Village. 

A few factoids that the rest of the world might not yet know about yerself: 

1. During my third summer at Placid Planet I almost threw a Dura-Ace equipped Trek Madone into the cardboard compactor at the dump. As I was hoisting that old bike box in it rattled all funny like, so I stopped mid-heave. Everyone gave me a real bag o’ shit for it, but hey, look how popular zero-sort recycling has become! And they say Mozart was ahead of his time.
2. I have the unofficial record at the Wednesday Night World Time Trial Championship, which I attained using a special skinsuit, my lucky helmet, and a dirt bike stashed in the woods at Deerwood Hills.
3. I spent one summer racing as a Cat 2 cyclist and supported myself by (a) not winning any prize money (b) nearly recycling brand-new bicycles and (c) working as a waiter at a local restaurant, which ended abruptly after I spilled a bottle of red wine in an old woman’s hair. Forget what all those tumblr pages say—amateur bike racing is all glamour.

Favorite thing about riding bikes: I saw you on the Manhattan-bound Brooklyn Q train. I was wearing a blue-striped t-shirt and a pair of maroon pants. You were wearing a vintage red skirt and a smart white blouse. We both wore glasses. I guess we still do. I fell in love with you a little bit, in that stupid way where you completely make up a fictional version of the person you’re looking at and fall in love with that person. But still I think there was something there. Wait, this was supposed to be about bikes? Maybe you had a bike with you? I still think there was something there…

What would you say it is you do around here, anyway? Here’s what I offer: vaguely helpful suggestions on which bike might best suit your riding style, incredibly helpful suggestions on where to find the best all-you-can-eat Wienerschnitzel restaurants in western Austria.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Crumbs Along the Mohawk, which is NOT the little-known sequel to Last of the Mohicans, but rather the most delicious flavor that the food chemists at Stewarts have concocted to date. Basically Rocky Road with a boatload of graham crackers tossed in for good measure.  

Closing remarks: The newscaster spoke with a barking sort of hilarity, as though life were a comical steeplechase, with unconventional steeds and hazards and vehicles involved. He made me feel that even I was a contestant– in a bathtub drawn by three aardvarks, perhaps. I had as good a chance as anybody to win.

College Advisor
Bridgette Deeney

Age: 20

Best Boss Ever
Bill Schneider

Title: Ex-Shop Manager/Master Nurse

Place of Birth: Bowling Green, Kentucky. (To our dismay, this is actually not where bowling was invented. However, from what we can tell, it is within striking distance of where the Louisville Slugger was invented.)

What would you say it is you do around here, anyway? I’m F.I.S.T. and Serotta Fit certified. Know what that means? I can make your Cannondale Super-6 feel more comfortable than a La-Z-Boy recliner at a Super Bowl Party. I know more about mountain bike suspension linkages than McCaullay Culkin knows about teen marriage pre-nup contracts, and I once met David Lee Roth rock climbing. Need I say more? 

Describe yourself in a sentence: More caffeinated than a meeting room full of Goldman Sachs interns, more helpful than chamois cream on the first century ride of the season. 

Dream bike: Sitting in my garage: 2014 Santa Cruz Tallboy complete with the Ben Frantz ‘Jammy-Jam’ parts spec.